Embrace Your Inner Inspector Gadget: Victoria’s Secret Knockout Front-Close Sport Bra Review
The Victoria’s Secret in The Mall in Columbia had recently been remodeled and reopened, so I had to go to this location because this was my go-to VS store. The store was gorgeous, and it was so much easier to shop for specific items with the new layout. All of the Victoria’s Secret Sport apparel was in one large section of the store, so I headed for that section, and proceeded to be overwhelmed.
There are so many types of sports bras in that store! At first, I thought I kept looking at the same ones over and over again, since they had the same colors and prints, but the helpful sales associate showed me the differences between each style. Some were subtle, and some were pretty obvious if I’d taken a second to stop and look. (Oops!) In my defense, I had just gone on a long run, and was smelling something awful, and didn’t want anybody or anything to be offended. I probably shouldn’t have gone into the mall, on second thought, but a busy lady doesn’t have all the time in the world to take a shower and get dressed decently for a quick trip to buy some sports bras, ya know?
Any-who, I spotted a really sassy style that I just knew I was going to have to pick up. I also grabbed another one that was more in my style comfort zone. I didn’t try them on in the store because I’m not that disgusting, and I assumed they’d fit because I am a frequent shopper and know my VS size. Note: I say VS size because their sizing is totally off from just about everybody else’s.
After I got home, showered, and dried off, I decided to check out those bad boys. Then I felt like a blob and changed my mind. BUT THEN, a few days later, I decided to take one of them out for a test spin. After a quick Instagram poll, I decided not to test out the Knockout Front-Close Sport Bra that I’d purchased. Not yet. A few days later, I finally decided to test it out. Man, I really shouldn’t have waited so long.
I have never been so disappointed with a sports bra! Not only was it super tight and uncomfortable, it was super difficult to get on! I would actually have to be Inspector Gadget to work this sports bra with ease!
Let’s go over why I wouldn’t recommend this sports bra to anyone (including Inspector Gadget).
First of all, this is how it’s supposed to look. Weird. Nobody has their boobs in their throat like I did. Their boobs also weren’t moving like a water bed. RED FLAG, PEOPLE! YOUR BOOBS SHOULD NOT BE IN YOUR THROAT AND MOVING LIKE A WATER BED! Glad I got that off my chest (pardon the pun).
Secondly, I don’t know what sort of engineering degree is necessary to snap this darned thing. If I struggled to put it on when I wasn’t in a rush to get anywhere, how was I supposed to snap it when I was in a rush between work and a volleyball game? It was also difficult to unsnap. I tried it while wearing it and without putting it on, and failed miserably both times.
I thought we were friends, Victoria’s Secret! |
I don’t completely understand the concept of this bra. It has what looks like a regular demi bra underneath a sports bra. You snap the demi bra (IF YOU’RE A WIZARD), then you zip the sports bra so that your boobs are under your chin to complete this sports bra wearing task.
I’m sorry I’m not sorry to express so much contempt for this sports bra, you guys. I have a couple of great new sports bras from Victoria’s Secret, but this is definitely not one. (I’ll be reviewing those soon, so don’t worry!) For a company that specializes in women’s undergarments, you’d think their sports bra game would be on point 100% of the time. Nope.
The one thing about the Knockout Front-Close Sport Bra I didn’t loathe (silver lining!) was the fact that it had adjustable straps. This is pretty important for me, and I know lots of other women love to be able to adjust their bras as well.